Sunday, February 2, 2014

February 2014 Desktop Calender

Its been a month since my father passed away and there has not been a day when I havent thought of him...
not consciously- not obviously, not openly.
just with a deep pang in my heart....
just some random thought that would bring his image flooding back to my mind...
it would maybe just be someone's smile that reminded me of him- or maybe a loud laugh in a gathering of people that made me turn my head in surprise...
it might be just an image on the internet of a neta (a politician) who wore the kurta pajama just like he wore it.
It mayb just an old scanned photograph that I came across on my hard disk...( which is the inspiration behind today's illustration)
Or maybe when I open the blog everyday, I unconsciously open the blog-post that I dedicated to him some days back (its here) and read it again and yet again...
and ask my husband whimsically.... "I smile just like him, na?"
It not that I missed him everyday when he was alive, or clung to him- or even called him every day...
Its now when he has gone from our lives that I miss him so terribly...
Everyday.
We had our differences... and being the eldest daughter, I was the most vocal about my displeasure about a lot of things, and was the only one who was allowed to get away with murder.
Rest of my siblings would be quelled with one look.
And now I wish I had shown him more love and appreciation for all that he was to us...
all that he did for us...
The legacy that he has left for us....
I wish.

Today's Desktop Calender is inspired from an old photograph of all four sisters (we are a brood of five sisters and one brother- the last two hadn't been born yet) piled on top of our ever suffering father while he carries us around on his back!
Its a very fond memory of my childhood.


And as February is the month of love... and which love on earth can compare to the unconditional love of a parent for a child?
So if you are a father to a daughter who has got you completely wrapped around her little finger...
Or a loving daughter whose father is "the" man in her life....
Or a daughter like me who wishes that she could have done more, much more for him in his lifetime...
This February Calendar of LOVE is for all of you!



(for my frenz who ask me all the time):
Just right-click on the image, save it on your desktop.
And then right-click on the saved image and set as desktop calender!

8 comments:

  1. What a beautiful post:-) Sorry about you dad.. It's so true, and a good reminder to us all. best to you:-)

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    Replies
    1. Thank you Eli for yr words of support and for liking the post.
      I love going through yr blog as well- a good fun read!

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  2. i love it! saving it for the husband :-)

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    1. thank you Gauri, i hope yr husband likes it!

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  3. you made me cry maryam.. the picture caught me totally un-prepared... i love the post...

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  4. Marro Apa... this is really good i saved it as my desktop background. I miss him so much . his memories flashes back so many times in so many ways.. in the smell of smoke... perfumes... and so much more....

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    Replies
    1. zoya, Darling!
      just saw yr message when i went thru this favorite post of mine...
      cant believe its already been a year and I still miss him so much!

      Delete

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